Over the past month, I've debated about "blogging" about my experiences as a college student. I think I have interesting experiences, and a decent writing style, but these days who doesn't? The blog in combination with our gung-ho individualism has become a venue for every stupid person to share their deep thoughts on the mundane actions they go through every day. Whoohoo for you, now shut up.
So after declaring that - why yes, I will start writing here! And I'm procrastinating on my final, which I don't want to write. So here goes.
It's funny how each class develops a routine, an unofficial but completely known outcast/annoying student, and its own secret jokes. There is one guy in two of my classes, Fahad, who has become notorious in both for his strange questions. In an education class, he spent 10 minutes explaining the different between classical conditioning and operant. No one cared, though I was amused by his example of negative reinforcement: "and I say 'if you don't brush your teeth I'll, I don't know, stick this pencil in your eye'." Whoa man! Haha.
I didn't have much antipathy towards the guy - though such characters are annoying for monopolizing class time with idiotic questions, I generally feel sorry for them. I can imagine they feel the waves of annoyance and disdain that other students are inevitably sending (I am too, probably). Ironically, I think this is part of my larger issue - judgment. My own face, in making a comment, goes bright red as a speak. 70% of the time. Even when I believe what I am saying. And I judge others on their comments so often, I think I imagine that they are judging me. Oh Zoe, you tortured soul.
But on a break time, Fahad mentioned how awesome it was that 'all these girls are walking around in bikinis' with some kind of disgusting grin on his face. Really, buddy? Do you have to think like that? You just replaced my somewhat-sympathy with low-level hatred.
Then there are the graduate students, who sit in a row, like a line of crows on a telephone wire, behind me. There is an unconscious divide between the graduates and undergraduates, especially progressing into the course. One boy, in particular, who I will not grace with a name (because I don't remember it) makes a goal of mentioning as many other countries as possible. "The political schema in Nigeria at the time could be compared to the post-modernist hegemony in Bosnia in the 50's - you know, the pre-socialist realism the two have in common?" WOW. You are intelligent.
Enough said. I.e., procrastination time is over. Adios, invisible audience.
